I hate being this pathetic at a game! Tekken made much more sense to me. This one feels clumsy and unresponsive and unintuitive. Sometimes you're actually supposed to zig-zag with the control stick. WTF? AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!
It's so pretty!!!!!!! (minus the anime scenes. Anime in a game is lame)
Thursday, February 26, 2009
Wednesday, February 18, 2009
What've you been playing?
I think putting a weekly post just talking about what we've been playing would be a good idea. They do it on Destructoid's primary podcast and I think it's a great idea to throw some impressions of stuff around without exactly giving a full-blown review/final thoughts of a game.
I have started to play the new Prince of Persia (borrowed from a friend) and honestly don't like it so far. I saw my friend beat it as well and wasn't impressed, in fact was slightly irritated by it. I also feel the story of it near the end resonated a lot with Shadow of the Colossus for me, and SotC is by far a more superior game in my eyes on multiple fronts. I'm nearing the end of Crackdown (I think so at least) and have experienced co-op online with my friend and really enjoyed it. I have also been playing a huge amount of Geometry Wars 2 and N+. N+ is addictive as hell to me, the perfection demanded by some levels is frustratingly delicious. Geometry Wars 2, while a very different game from the first, introduces some amazing different gametypes. Pacifism is freaking awesome and I am addicted to it.
On an unrelated note I bought both Mastodon's Blood Mountain and Leviathan albums and they are freaking amazing. This is during my recent adventure into metal.
P.S. JFU do you have PixelJunk or Flower or Super Stardust HD? I want to try those so much since I have found a deep love for the gems I have been finding XBLA.
I have started to play the new Prince of Persia (borrowed from a friend) and honestly don't like it so far. I saw my friend beat it as well and wasn't impressed, in fact was slightly irritated by it. I also feel the story of it near the end resonated a lot with Shadow of the Colossus for me, and SotC is by far a more superior game in my eyes on multiple fronts. I'm nearing the end of Crackdown (I think so at least) and have experienced co-op online with my friend and really enjoyed it. I have also been playing a huge amount of Geometry Wars 2 and N+. N+ is addictive as hell to me, the perfection demanded by some levels is frustratingly delicious. Geometry Wars 2, while a very different game from the first, introduces some amazing different gametypes. Pacifism is freaking awesome and I am addicted to it.
On an unrelated note I bought both Mastodon's Blood Mountain and Leviathan albums and they are freaking amazing. This is during my recent adventure into metal.
P.S. JFU do you have PixelJunk or Flower or Super Stardust HD? I want to try those so much since I have found a deep love for the gems I have been finding XBLA.
About this bullshit I'm doing...- Z.O.E. The Second Runner
Personal Story
So, one day, me and the John Fu decide we're going to stop putting off playing Z.O.E. That it's high time that we play the sequel to a very fun game. Well, it's really fucking hard and we have a lot of trouble with it. We end up giving up at the second boss who is the first runner and the main character of the first game. He has two forms, a flying motherfucker and a mech form (a.k.a. Orbital Frame). You can only damage the mech form, but the flying form shot out a lot of shit at us. We couldn't survive long enough most times to fight the mech form.
The fact that you fight the first runner, I always thought that was kinda cool. Albeit this kid didn't have to fucking fight you like he did, but he sincerely thought you were an enemy so who blames him.
I always thought about that and so when I saw Z.O.E. 2 for 7 bucks, I picked it up.
Nothing's changed. The same two problems John Fu and I had back then I have now.
Real shit
Z.O.E. requires you to think fast. Not only think fast, but perceive fast. In less than a second, you have to attack, figure out what your attack did, and figure out what to do next. Not so uncommon, right? Z.O.E. 2's as fast as Ninja gaiden but with a lot more flashy lights, and the flashy lights are really really distracting. It's easy is Z.O.E. 2 to button-smash square twice and suddenly be slammed up against a wall with half-health barely understanding what just happened. As far as you know it sounded like you were hitting something, the controller was vibrating but that could have meant a hit too. I don't know if the fact that the stimulus you get in fighting is hard to discern represents a design flaw. It does make the game harder.
And speaking of design flaws, let me tell you about some ridiculous shit to exemplify a video game standard that I despise. That standard is condition-based damage-dealing. Ok, so you are Dingo Egret in your Orbital Frame. The orbital frame of the chick you're working for has been taken over by a battle A.I.. In order to remove the battle A.I. from the chick's orbital frame, you must grab the orbital frame. Unfortunately, you can only grab the orbital frame after crossing swords which takes a shitload of timing. Of course, she's not always ready to cross swords. You have a limited number of chances to cross swords with her and a certain amount of times you must cross swords with her in order for her to fall back stunned so you can grab and delete her. If you succeed or fail, she will then move on to her attacking stage where she either tries to hit you with a super energy beam or throws little exploding shits at you. Do this over and over again because it will take some fucking time on normal difficulty. Worse yet, be sure to not fuck up and actually hit the other orbital frame because that will eventually kill her and cause you to lose. Don't take hits yourself because you'll lose that way too. And don't leave that crazy bitch in the orbital frame alone because the a.i. will shock the pilot and that will do damage to the orbital frame and you will lose. Do you understand yet how difficult this is?
Condition-based damage-dealing is bullshit. It's that shit in Ocarina of Time where you waited for the spider thing to drop from the ceiling, turn it's back, so you could hit it once, and then it turned around again, so you had to wait again. It's really really boring to have to wait to hit, and especially in cases when motherfuckers can hit you all they want. It's most difficult because you never have to do it just once. You have to keep doing it until the other thing is dead, and I hate that. This part of Z.O.E. may be stretching me harder than anything I've played in a long while, but it's annoying and I lose patience with it very easily.
It's in every game. There are always good times and bad times to attack. Ninja gaiden had a softer version though. You could still attack bosses in the middle of their attacks, it just wasn't advisable. I prefer softer versions like this because it's quicker and there's less waiting around.
I think I can do this thing...
Ok, so I did that thing. Now I'm stuck on a similar battle where I very rarely have chances to do battle, and I'm just very very slowly wearing down the boss' health. Another part of gaming I hate is when difficulty increases solely by enemy health increases. It's not harder now, it just takes longer.
La-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-lyndon BJ
So, one day, me and the John Fu decide we're going to stop putting off playing Z.O.E. That it's high time that we play the sequel to a very fun game. Well, it's really fucking hard and we have a lot of trouble with it. We end up giving up at the second boss who is the first runner and the main character of the first game. He has two forms, a flying motherfucker and a mech form (a.k.a. Orbital Frame). You can only damage the mech form, but the flying form shot out a lot of shit at us. We couldn't survive long enough most times to fight the mech form.
The fact that you fight the first runner, I always thought that was kinda cool. Albeit this kid didn't have to fucking fight you like he did, but he sincerely thought you were an enemy so who blames him.
I always thought about that and so when I saw Z.O.E. 2 for 7 bucks, I picked it up.
Nothing's changed. The same two problems John Fu and I had back then I have now.
Real shit
Z.O.E. requires you to think fast. Not only think fast, but perceive fast. In less than a second, you have to attack, figure out what your attack did, and figure out what to do next. Not so uncommon, right? Z.O.E. 2's as fast as Ninja gaiden but with a lot more flashy lights, and the flashy lights are really really distracting. It's easy is Z.O.E. 2 to button-smash square twice and suddenly be slammed up against a wall with half-health barely understanding what just happened. As far as you know it sounded like you were hitting something, the controller was vibrating but that could have meant a hit too. I don't know if the fact that the stimulus you get in fighting is hard to discern represents a design flaw. It does make the game harder.
And speaking of design flaws, let me tell you about some ridiculous shit to exemplify a video game standard that I despise. That standard is condition-based damage-dealing. Ok, so you are Dingo Egret in your Orbital Frame. The orbital frame of the chick you're working for has been taken over by a battle A.I.. In order to remove the battle A.I. from the chick's orbital frame, you must grab the orbital frame. Unfortunately, you can only grab the orbital frame after crossing swords which takes a shitload of timing. Of course, she's not always ready to cross swords. You have a limited number of chances to cross swords with her and a certain amount of times you must cross swords with her in order for her to fall back stunned so you can grab and delete her. If you succeed or fail, she will then move on to her attacking stage where she either tries to hit you with a super energy beam or throws little exploding shits at you. Do this over and over again because it will take some fucking time on normal difficulty. Worse yet, be sure to not fuck up and actually hit the other orbital frame because that will eventually kill her and cause you to lose. Don't take hits yourself because you'll lose that way too. And don't leave that crazy bitch in the orbital frame alone because the a.i. will shock the pilot and that will do damage to the orbital frame and you will lose. Do you understand yet how difficult this is?
Condition-based damage-dealing is bullshit. It's that shit in Ocarina of Time where you waited for the spider thing to drop from the ceiling, turn it's back, so you could hit it once, and then it turned around again, so you had to wait again. It's really really boring to have to wait to hit, and especially in cases when motherfuckers can hit you all they want. It's most difficult because you never have to do it just once. You have to keep doing it until the other thing is dead, and I hate that. This part of Z.O.E. may be stretching me harder than anything I've played in a long while, but it's annoying and I lose patience with it very easily.
It's in every game. There are always good times and bad times to attack. Ninja gaiden had a softer version though. You could still attack bosses in the middle of their attacks, it just wasn't advisable. I prefer softer versions like this because it's quicker and there's less waiting around.
I think I can do this thing...
Ok, so I did that thing. Now I'm stuck on a similar battle where I very rarely have chances to do battle, and I'm just very very slowly wearing down the boss' health. Another part of gaming I hate is when difficulty increases solely by enemy health increases. It's not harder now, it just takes longer.
La-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-lyndon BJ
Friday, February 13, 2009
HOLY F@&K
My posts never tend to include thoughtful analysis of a game... and this one will be no different. For your viewing pleasure, I present to you the crazy awesome, epic trailer for God of War III. Seriously, I don't think any game can even come close to matching the sheer brutality of this series. I am weak in the knees. Enough chat... watch the badass!
Tuesday, February 10, 2009
F.E.A.R - That's right - F.E.A.R.
Boring personal story
Yeah, well, I mean the gamer makes the experience which makes the game. 3 years ago John Fu bought this game for me for graduation (I think it was graduation anyway). He and I and a few others played it. One of the guys was flat hilarious and for every cheap scare, he screamed and said, "Oh my god, F.E.A.R.!" For whatever reason, three years ago, I stopped playing this game at the second building. This time was different.
Actual talk on F.E.A.R.
The best parts of F.E.A.R. (god that's obnoxious to write) are when it makes you question what you're seeing and when the A.I. fucks you over with their super flanking skills.
The worst parts are the bland bland environments which are larger than life itself and impractical as shit. Also, the repetitive enter a room, get attacked by people random battle format gets overplayed like some shit. The puzzles are ok but, without a map, are some times unnecessarily difficult. The game is also slightly immature. The voice actors cuss at really inappropriate times and make inappropriate comments that make you wonder who you're really supposed to like in the game. Maybe that's just me, but I'm not a fan of an exec dismissing sexual harassment complaints as bullshit or your commanding officer calling a hostage an incessant bitch. There are also some technical issues like the Doppler effect and how you may be three floors underneath blood dripping from a ceiling but you can still hear it loud as day. Loading times. Volume control. No subtitles. Pauses in gameplay when something's about to happen. Off-kilter Scripted sequences.
The story goes both good and bad. First of all, I gotta make a comment about this "learn-as-you-go" thing that's come into fashion. It takes a lot of attention, and I wasn't always paying that hard of attention because it was late at night or the voice-mail thing was bothering me or I was looking at a poster or I just thought the concepts were lame. So, I looked up the Wikipedia article to see what I'd missed. John Fu and I ended up doing the same thing for Resistance 2. I would love to spend the time collecting all the intel in the game, but I really don't want to spend the time. Wikipedia's quicker.
So, a prominent defense contractor decides that creating a psychic commander to control its clone army is a good idea (WTF? A psychic commander?), and so they make a psychic commander, but...whoops...he goes nuts. That brings you (nameless, faceless character) in. The fact that you're nameless and faceless becomes important later and would have shocked me if Bioshock hadn't pulled the same trick years later and if I had played these games in chronological order. But, I feel like I'm giving too much away. The game is fucking scary. The villain is very well-characterized by the end. I'm excited for the latest one.
-early in the LBJ
Yeah, well, I mean the gamer makes the experience which makes the game. 3 years ago John Fu bought this game for me for graduation (I think it was graduation anyway). He and I and a few others played it. One of the guys was flat hilarious and for every cheap scare, he screamed and said, "Oh my god, F.E.A.R.!" For whatever reason, three years ago, I stopped playing this game at the second building. This time was different.
Actual talk on F.E.A.R.
The best parts of F.E.A.R. (god that's obnoxious to write) are when it makes you question what you're seeing and when the A.I. fucks you over with their super flanking skills.
The worst parts are the bland bland environments which are larger than life itself and impractical as shit. Also, the repetitive enter a room, get attacked by people random battle format gets overplayed like some shit. The puzzles are ok but, without a map, are some times unnecessarily difficult. The game is also slightly immature. The voice actors cuss at really inappropriate times and make inappropriate comments that make you wonder who you're really supposed to like in the game. Maybe that's just me, but I'm not a fan of an exec dismissing sexual harassment complaints as bullshit or your commanding officer calling a hostage an incessant bitch. There are also some technical issues like the Doppler effect and how you may be three floors underneath blood dripping from a ceiling but you can still hear it loud as day. Loading times. Volume control. No subtitles. Pauses in gameplay when something's about to happen. Off-kilter Scripted sequences.
The story goes both good and bad. First of all, I gotta make a comment about this "learn-as-you-go" thing that's come into fashion. It takes a lot of attention, and I wasn't always paying that hard of attention because it was late at night or the voice-mail thing was bothering me or I was looking at a poster or I just thought the concepts were lame. So, I looked up the Wikipedia article to see what I'd missed. John Fu and I ended up doing the same thing for Resistance 2. I would love to spend the time collecting all the intel in the game, but I really don't want to spend the time. Wikipedia's quicker.
So, a prominent defense contractor decides that creating a psychic commander to control its clone army is a good idea (WTF? A psychic commander?), and so they make a psychic commander, but...whoops...he goes nuts. That brings you (nameless, faceless character) in. The fact that you're nameless and faceless becomes important later and would have shocked me if Bioshock hadn't pulled the same trick years later and if I had played these games in chronological order. But, I feel like I'm giving too much away. The game is fucking scary. The villain is very well-characterized by the end. I'm excited for the latest one.
-early in the LBJ
Max Payne the Movie
Well, I hope it helps bring in money and interest in a third game...
The movie has some great instances of character development, especially with BB who has a really twisted monologue. They even mention Max's father, which is sweet! The Valkyr has neat effects on Max. Visually, it's pretty beautiful. I think it takes a lot from Sin City, but it also resembles the source material.
In a lot of other ways it doesn't resemble the source material. Like the ongoing inner monologue has been removed. Mona Sax's sister is now Russian, played by Jackie from That 70s Show/Meg griffin. Bravura is Ludacris. Lupino is latin-american. And Max Payne is working a cold-case unit, not undercover That part especially is troublesome to me.
The old game cover reads "Stand Back, A Man with Nothing to Lose." In the game, that's true. Max is wanted for murder by the police and wanted by the underworld for being a cop. He hits a point of no return and never looks back.
Max Payne in the movie has a career and a chance to explain himself and work with Bravura to get justice. He chooses not to.
Ok, but I'm an asshole.
I would have started this movie out bullet-time gun-fight, heavy inner monologue and explain my way back in between the shooting. You can explain the bullet-time with Valkyr as a combat-enhancing drug. Then cast fucking Michael Madsen as Max! I would also have the guns in the movie have recoil or semi-automatics run out of bullets.
This movie wasn't horrible. I just wanted to direct it myself, you know.
I'm that asshole
-The Lo Bo Jo
The movie has some great instances of character development, especially with BB who has a really twisted monologue. They even mention Max's father, which is sweet! The Valkyr has neat effects on Max. Visually, it's pretty beautiful. I think it takes a lot from Sin City, but it also resembles the source material.
In a lot of other ways it doesn't resemble the source material. Like the ongoing inner monologue has been removed. Mona Sax's sister is now Russian, played by Jackie from That 70s Show/Meg griffin. Bravura is Ludacris. Lupino is latin-american. And Max Payne is working a cold-case unit, not undercover That part especially is troublesome to me.
The old game cover reads "Stand Back, A Man with Nothing to Lose." In the game, that's true. Max is wanted for murder by the police and wanted by the underworld for being a cop. He hits a point of no return and never looks back.
Max Payne in the movie has a career and a chance to explain himself and work with Bravura to get justice. He chooses not to.
Ok, but I'm an asshole.
I would have started this movie out bullet-time gun-fight, heavy inner monologue and explain my way back in between the shooting. You can explain the bullet-time with Valkyr as a combat-enhancing drug. Then cast fucking Michael Madsen as Max! I would also have the guns in the movie have recoil or semi-automatics run out of bullets.
This movie wasn't horrible. I just wanted to direct it myself, you know.
I'm that asshole
-The Lo Bo Jo
Sunday, February 8, 2009
When acknowledging a good game is not good enough
In about 2 weeks Killzone 2 will be coming out for the PS3. Judging by the amazingly positive reception it is garnering from reviews it should be an awesome payoff for those who have waited patiently. I do not have a PS3 but I did play the first iteration on the Playstation 2 I thought it was pretty solid, multi-player FPS games are not really my thing anymore. One primary praise I have seen for Killzone 2 so far has been the amazingly stellar level design in it's multi-player levels. This would be a huge incentive for me personally when picking up something like this. So what is the point of this post? I love video games, evidently another really good game has been made and one would think the world would rejoice in it's impending release to the public. No, that isn't the case because inhabitants of the interwebs can't allow it to have a peaceful reception.
Jim Sterling from Destructoid wrote an awesome overview of this phenomena which is apparently happening. Overzealous fans always seem to want to ruin it for everyone. Not only has there been a volatile response to the lowest review for Killzone 2 on Gamerankings from Total Video Games but fans of the game in question have been quick to post on most anything related to the game. This is causing me to recall months ago on Gametrailers how multiple times a week people were making a thread on their forums about Killzone 2 and how they were looking forward to it. As opposed to listening to most of the comment responses and making a Killzone 2 permanent post in the PS3 section the fans had to keep starting threads in general discussion every week. That is either an unfortunate group of fans which the game is ashamed to be associated with or an incredibly genius marketing scheme. On top of it all these crazed fans (I sympathize with rational fans who are unfortunately tied to these people just because they appreciate a good game) are attacking reviews that give Killzone 2 a perfect score. Adam Sessler makes a great response to his critics that described G4's review with "Sure it's a 5/5 but it killed you guys a little on the inside, didn't it?".
If anything this news has put a smile on my face at how ridiculous it is. Honestly though it's rather depressing when the controversy caused by this game is made more by it's most loyal fans in being not satisfied enough with it's high review scores. Evidently if someone gives a game an 8/10, which is still a great score, because it is not perfect and differs from other ratings the person should lose their job? Fanboys disgust me and just need to get out. I personally like playing games. I don't care what console it is on, when a game is done well I am happy.
Jim Sterling from Destructoid wrote an awesome overview of this phenomena which is apparently happening. Overzealous fans always seem to want to ruin it for everyone. Not only has there been a volatile response to the lowest review for Killzone 2 on Gamerankings from Total Video Games but fans of the game in question have been quick to post on most anything related to the game. This is causing me to recall months ago on Gametrailers how multiple times a week people were making a thread on their forums about Killzone 2 and how they were looking forward to it. As opposed to listening to most of the comment responses and making a Killzone 2 permanent post in the PS3 section the fans had to keep starting threads in general discussion every week. That is either an unfortunate group of fans which the game is ashamed to be associated with or an incredibly genius marketing scheme. On top of it all these crazed fans (I sympathize with rational fans who are unfortunately tied to these people just because they appreciate a good game) are attacking reviews that give Killzone 2 a perfect score. Adam Sessler makes a great response to his critics that described G4's review with "Sure it's a 5/5 but it killed you guys a little on the inside, didn't it?".
If anything this news has put a smile on my face at how ridiculous it is. Honestly though it's rather depressing when the controversy caused by this game is made more by it's most loyal fans in being not satisfied enough with it's high review scores. Evidently if someone gives a game an 8/10, which is still a great score, because it is not perfect and differs from other ratings the person should lose their job? Fanboys disgust me and just need to get out. I personally like playing games. I don't care what console it is on, when a game is done well I am happy.
Saturday, February 7, 2009
A Crossover for the Ages
I like video games. I also like David Bowie. In fact, I like both a whole lot. God bless you Destructoid for taking the time to combine the two.
Starman will blow your mind
Starman will blow your mind
Friday, February 6, 2009
I'M BACK BITCHES
YES... this means I have a new, WORKING laptop... which might mean I will post more but only time will tell. I've got a few things to say... maybe they will eventually make it on to this blog. Anyways, know that I haven't abandoned all of ye 3 readers. Huzzah for hp and backlit keyboards!!!
Wednesday, February 4, 2009
Bits and Bobs
So first I wanna cite two awesome posts that were put up on Kotaku earlier today.
First some people over at SA produced a bunch of oldies/"classic" covers for games here. I love the retro look to them and the somewhat simplistic presentation, very cool. Also they featured an author's take on the Columbine shootings here. While the subject and issue has been beaten to death many times I found the excerpt a refreshing read and piqued my interest in one day checking the book out.
Also I found the title of this special unit rather humorous. This obviously means a zombie outbreak will be ensuing near VTech.
I am now heading out to pick up some stuff from Best Buy with a handy Reward Zone coupon. I aim to grab some more Microsoft Points and then pick up R-Type Dimensions which came out today on XBLA. I love shoot-em-ups so very very much. Although I don't think I am very good at them I am absolutely entranced whenever I play them. I am glad that I own quite a bit because the differing styles of gameplay amongst them offer such unique experiences. Oh god I have so many now that I think about it, they definitely end up working off however much you pay for them because you revisit them so much.
First some people over at SA produced a bunch of oldies/"classic" covers for games here. I love the retro look to them and the somewhat simplistic presentation, very cool. Also they featured an author's take on the Columbine shootings here. While the subject and issue has been beaten to death many times I found the excerpt a refreshing read and piqued my interest in one day checking the book out.
Also I found the title of this special unit rather humorous. This obviously means a zombie outbreak will be ensuing near VTech.
I am now heading out to pick up some stuff from Best Buy with a handy Reward Zone coupon. I aim to grab some more Microsoft Points and then pick up R-Type Dimensions which came out today on XBLA. I love shoot-em-ups so very very much. Although I don't think I am very good at them I am absolutely entranced whenever I play them. I am glad that I own quite a bit because the differing styles of gameplay amongst them offer such unique experiences. Oh god I have so many now that I think about it, they definitely end up working off however much you pay for them because you revisit them so much.
A Million Endings
You know how Lord of the Rings had a million endings, and so did mgs4 and Yakuza 1 and Yakuza 2? You know how the millions of twists to make the millions of endings undercut the original motives of the characters?
I'm used to that now. I think I'm starting to be ok with it. I don't like it, you could have made a much tighter ending, but there are a lot of things that I'm glad didn't happen at the end of Yakuza 2....so whatever. It could have been worse.
The honeymoon with that game has been over for a long time. It ended about halfway through. When every thing but the main story is spectacular, watching boring cutscenes with the tear-jerking up to 11 makes the whole gaming experience feel...ughh
I'm used to that now. I think I'm starting to be ok with it. I don't like it, you could have made a much tighter ending, but there are a lot of things that I'm glad didn't happen at the end of Yakuza 2....so whatever. It could have been worse.
The honeymoon with that game has been over for a long time. It ended about halfway through. When every thing but the main story is spectacular, watching boring cutscenes with the tear-jerking up to 11 makes the whole gaming experience feel...ughh
I Love Christian Bale
I saw a link to this and just wow. This is awesome.
I honestly can't judge the situation since you hear about how strung out and stressful working on the set of a movie can get. Especially when they're under pressure to get stuff done on time while taking enough material to satisfy when putting the movie together. Either way it's intense and awesome as hell.
I honestly can't judge the situation since you hear about how strung out and stressful working on the set of a movie can get. Especially when they're under pressure to get stuff done on time while taking enough material to satisfy when putting the movie together. Either way it's intense and awesome as hell.
Tuesday, February 3, 2009
Saints Row 2 - Voiceover Trailer
Eliza Dushku is fucking hot and Daniel Dae Kim is a badass!
This is that shit I was talkin about before. This sets the tone for the rest of the game. Your character is above law and order. Cops are just a nuisance.
How come no one else played a hot african-american female? Aren't video games for escapism? I mean, at first, I was kinda uncomfortable, but...it was so worth it.
OK OK OK OK OK OK OK NOKAY? OK? FUCK YOU, KAY!
-shit
RE5 Impressions
Do I need to introduce this game or its demo? No, so now my goal is to make you, the reader, laugh or nod your head accordingly. So, let's do it.
Shit!
There is a lot of shit going on in this game! More enemies, pyramid heads, and another person's inventory and health to manage. Not that she's a burden, actually I feel like her AI's a better and quicker shot than me, but still suddenly she's too close to the pyramid head and he'll chop her down, suddenly she's knifing people and you think, "Oh, how cool that she's conserving ammo" when really she's out of bullets! Suddenly as you're about to uppercut some dude, she shoots him and he dies and you curse her for wasting her ammo! Do you even need to conserve ammo as much in this game? And where am I supposed to hide? Are there actually good cover positions? Shit, this shit stresses me out. I'm gonna throw a grenade to "help" Sheva...
MATTER OF FACT...
Sheva
Bitch, fuck your accent, and fucking help me! There's a vaj comin' out of that dude's head and it wants me! Why are you making me jiggle my left stick so hard? I don't know if that does damage to the controller long term! Oh, yeah, and stop calling me partner! It sends mixed messages, "tiger!"
Survival Horror?
Why the fuck can't you run away? I mean that's not really the point, but every once in a while when Sheva is too dumb to back away from encroaching zombies, I really just want the safety of running the fuck away or jumping fences or some shit. Survival horror = run away please!
Environments
Bigger, seem much bigger and somewhat intimidating to navigate. They're prettier, fun to explore. Thank god for red barrels.
Sound
Chris, why you make so much noise when you run? What is all your equipment here even for? And goddamn, why you gotta pant after every time you change weapons? It's like, "Sigh...I guess I'll pull out my rifle..." Xx_Chris_xX! Fucking do it! Zombies comin' up the hell right now!
Chris v. Leon
Leon's a little smarmy, you know? Chris seems a little nicer. And I wonder about Sheva and his relationship to her.
Africa
I remember thinking there was some imperialist/colonial undertones in having a game like this in Africa. I mean, if you want, you could see RE4 as a rural/urban class struggle, maybe even some feudal shit with that little spanish Napoleon dude. I don't know, so I thought I would feel uncomfortable. I mostly just feel scared. Sure, the game takes advantage of the unstable nature of African nations, but...I don't think it's to a negative effect. I don't know. Shit. I aint no anthropologist.
I think this'll be a fun game once I stop feeling so stressed out about basic combat. Shit!
-Wazzza mah nahme, huhh? Wazza?
Shit!
There is a lot of shit going on in this game! More enemies, pyramid heads, and another person's inventory and health to manage. Not that she's a burden, actually I feel like her AI's a better and quicker shot than me, but still suddenly she's too close to the pyramid head and he'll chop her down, suddenly she's knifing people and you think, "Oh, how cool that she's conserving ammo" when really she's out of bullets! Suddenly as you're about to uppercut some dude, she shoots him and he dies and you curse her for wasting her ammo! Do you even need to conserve ammo as much in this game? And where am I supposed to hide? Are there actually good cover positions? Shit, this shit stresses me out. I'm gonna throw a grenade to "help" Sheva...
MATTER OF FACT...
Sheva
Bitch, fuck your accent, and fucking help me! There's a vaj comin' out of that dude's head and it wants me! Why are you making me jiggle my left stick so hard? I don't know if that does damage to the controller long term! Oh, yeah, and stop calling me partner! It sends mixed messages, "tiger!"
Survival Horror?
Why the fuck can't you run away? I mean that's not really the point, but every once in a while when Sheva is too dumb to back away from encroaching zombies, I really just want the safety of running the fuck away or jumping fences or some shit. Survival horror = run away please!
Environments
Bigger, seem much bigger and somewhat intimidating to navigate. They're prettier, fun to explore. Thank god for red barrels.
Sound
Chris, why you make so much noise when you run? What is all your equipment here even for? And goddamn, why you gotta pant after every time you change weapons? It's like, "Sigh...I guess I'll pull out my rifle..." Xx_Chris_xX! Fucking do it! Zombies comin' up the hell right now!
Chris v. Leon
Leon's a little smarmy, you know? Chris seems a little nicer. And I wonder about Sheva and his relationship to her.
Africa
I remember thinking there was some imperialist/colonial undertones in having a game like this in Africa. I mean, if you want, you could see RE4 as a rural/urban class struggle, maybe even some feudal shit with that little spanish Napoleon dude. I don't know, so I thought I would feel uncomfortable. I mostly just feel scared. Sure, the game takes advantage of the unstable nature of African nations, but...I don't think it's to a negative effect. I don't know. Shit. I aint no anthropologist.
I think this'll be a fun game once I stop feeling so stressed out about basic combat. Shit!
-Wazzza mah nahme, huhh? Wazza?
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)